Self respect

I had a very important realization today.  My wife and I got into a heated argument over something absolutely stupid.  I was getting ready for work and was in the bathroom.  Well, I went from brushing my teeth to getting in the shower without telling my wife.  She burst into the bathroom and started yelling at me for not telling her I was getting in the shower now.  It's not because she wanted in the shower, but rather because she wanted the kids to brush their teeth.  I did not respond favorably.  I wasn't mean but I didn't take her "seriously".  Then she started yelling at me about how I thought I was boss because I am boss at work and I tell people what to do all the time.  Which was odd because up to this point I didn't tell anyone anything....I simply got in the shower.  She was the one telling crap.  Finally I told her she could yell all she wanted, I'd try to do better (at God knows what), but if she wants to yell at me, she's playing the wrong game because I won't live my life like that.  Then she told me how much she refrains from yelling.  Which it's a good thing she does because I'd be gone gone gone if  I had to deal with much more crazy than I have.  
So what this made me start thinking is what has changed?  We never used to have these confrontations.  What has changed is I'm a self respecting man.  I didn't used to be.  I used to be depressed, beat down by my school and beat down by my wife and miserable.  Now that I feel I am more than a worthless piece of shit I refuse to take her crap.  She doesn't know how to respond to people standing up to her.  So we get what I had today.  I refuse to let myself go to the point that I was only a few years ago.  I was so miserable and I never realized how much my wife has played into my misery and low self value.  Never again.