Patience is a virtue

Patience is a virtue and I am not yet very virtuous.  I know I have nothing to offer at this point in my life, I have nothing on the table. I really want to connect with you and have affirmation from you but for what?  So I can perpetuate fantasies in my head until I am ready to leave and start a new life? That's inane.  I do not want to leave one woman for another, I want to leave of pure heart and mind with clear conscience. As the Avett brothers say...when you run make sure you run to something and not away from... when I run, I want to run towards good decisions.  That's not saying that pursuing anything with you is not good.  Conversely it's saying that when I run I want to be able to choose you, not be obligated to you because you supported me when my life sucked.  I hope some day we can make amends, just not right now.  I know this and despite the pain and longing for your affirmation I will not push the matter.