I hate it when

I hate it when I go back and read what was and what transpired.  You were the best thing in my life and made me feel good and complete.  All my success and strength cannot make me feel like half the man you made me feel I was.  I know I am that man and so much more these days but it's you I lack.  The pain I caused that drove you away stabs me in the heart over and over daily.  I burn with desire to just hear your voice again.  This has been my own self made hell that I have spent damn near every evening in since we went our ways.  I fear it will haunt me for the rest of my life.