The same but different

I went to my old stomping grounds over the weekend.  I engaged in hobbies that I rarely have time for and enjoyed nature.  I saw the sun set and the moon rise, I saw the stars up in the sky.  I traveled the same roads and the same trails that I traveled merely a year ago.  I trod places that I went when I missed you, I went out with friends that have been tried and true.  Things were the same but different.  They were the same because my friends were still there and they still had love and care.  My travels and hobbies were the same, the hot spots and restaurants were all where I left them and it was fun as always.  It was different because I am different too.  I have changed and some things are not the same, I don't stay out, I don't party and carouse, I don't sit in the bars like a louse.  I have fear and respect that I never did before and I don't have you, that is oh-so sore.   Things were the same, but different.  In some ways good, in some was bad, in some ways it was fulfilling and in other ways hollow.   It was good to go out and remember, it was good to see people and be remembered, but it is you that's forever my memory. My memory of the places I've been, the love I've had and the heart that I broke.  The memory of my path and poor choices.  The memory of someone that changed my course forever.  Thank you for being real and shooting me straight.  I'd not be me today without you then.  For that, I can never forget you.